now i know...

now i know... the feeling of missing someone really badly... seriously... like in all those stories... where the characters feel like they're suffocating, they feel so tight at their chest area, they feel pain at the chest area... these feelings actually do exist... and the pain is really quite bad...

but do u know what is the damn thing??? every single thing... every tiny bit of them... they all bring back memories... and memories... in my case... aint good things... mmm...

just like today, i was on despatch, was sleeping in the car, then i suddenly woke up, look outside the car, discovered that i was near her place... then without any warnings... those memories... those damn but nice memories all rushed back... then tried concentrating on other things... well... tat did help...

mmm... but the relief aint forever, was looking through my msn contacts just now, my eyes came on to the nick which i have been trying so hard to avoid... then alot of those stupid pretty things rushed back to me... came like a Jonah Lomu (HUGE & FAST rugby player)... took the air out of me... damn damn... and thus... i understand how the characters in the stories felt... and i always thought they were just stories...